MST results were a disappointment. Failed the paper by a mark. Can you imagine how agony it feels when you just need 1 mark to pass?!!!! All I need is one tiny weeny mark but God didn't grant me the chance to pass.
MAf tutor spoke to me and asked what happened. She expected I would pass, even with a marginal mark but I disappointed her. She asked was it because I didn't understand the concepts, lack of preparation, did not attempt tutorials or didn't know how to do. I could not give her an answer, for I did not even know the answer! I just looked at her, shaked my head and shudder my shoulders. I attended lectures, attempted tutorials, tried past years papers, did all I could do to make myself understand the subject. At the end, I still could not make it. Given my results, how am I ever make it to uni??!!!! Regretted not studying well enough in year 1. Year 1 is the best time to really chiong for grades. Lesser projects, lesser deadlines to rush. Since school started in year 2, haven't had a good day of school. With all the projects deadlines to submit and assignments rushing, always sleeping after 12mn everyday and having difficulties to pay attention during lessons the next day. I tried to sleep early, but always failed to.
Even if I go for lectures, I'm also not understanding them. Literally just copied the answers without even considering what I've written makes sense. Tutor said this semester is a very crucial semester. It's either you make it or you don't. And those words left an impact in my mind. I don't want to fail, don't want to retake, not even wish to stay back for 4.1!!! I'm going for internship in sem 3.1 and that makes it even harder to score well. Sem 3.2 is the one and only last chance to flip myself from a salted fish back to a normal fish. I really sincerely hope I'm able to finish my studies smoothly. No failing/ re-taking of modules!! Tell me how can I digest my work well.
Alright, gonna crash, Head's spinning. Gonna wake up at 9am to complete my erm project and send to cindy to collate. Work at 6. Brain's too small to entertain foolish thoughts.
Gosh, I really need a breather! Suffocating to death soon~
Friday, January 6, 2012
Back again after donkey years~
Okay I'm back to my blog after 2 years plus. Totally forgot my blog still exists~ 2011 had been a hectic year and wasn't a smooth sailing one. Many things happened, some which I would not want to mention at all. Nonetheless, ended the last day of 2011 with a bang. Went vivocity for an impromptu countdown and to catch fireworks as well. Awesome fireworks to end it off wasn't a bad idea!!
Oh yes, I finally left cartel and joined gio on 25th Oct. Pay wasn't that much but at least I'm freed from that hell place. Spent my 2 weeks' break working, hoping that I will earn as much in the shortest time possible to repay Sarah. She was kind enough to loan me $350 to pay the fine. How did this fine came about? Well, naive-ess. More of stupidity I suppose. Even though I've heard rumours of him not being able to repay what he borrowed, I still went ahead and sign up an iphone for him. Really ought to slap myself to death.
He did not pay the bills; instead he went RWS to gamble. This kind of person ought to be banged to death, isn't it? His sister did not want to settle the bills because they fell out with each other over the iphone. His family gave him a big scolding and sent him off to KL. Initially, he assured me he's gonna to clear all the bills. Now, he's leaving this big pile of shit to clear for him! What's worse was, he could not be reached at his msia no anymoreeeeee. I'm really dead meat now. ''
Mum will definitely be livid if she knows about this matter. I really have no idea how am I gonna survive this. My heart can't take another lawyer's letter again. What I earned every month is not even enough to pay half of the bills! To top it off, I still have to pay my transport fees, meal allowance and etc. I am seriously in deep shit trouble now. Everytime when I open my letterbox, my hand trembles. I don't wish to receive any letters with my name on it. He even ignored the FB messages. Feeling super frustrated and lethargic about it and there's no one I can talk to about this matter so I can only post on my blog. Chinese New year is round the corner but I still have so much things in my head. Can't help but have a bad feeling like I will be kicked out of school if I'm taken to court for the next fine or mum will disown me. At times, really want to jump off and end this. Only when I disappear then everything will come to an end because that matter will remain a mystery forever. *double sighs*
Oh yes, I finally left cartel and joined gio on 25th Oct. Pay wasn't that much but at least I'm freed from that hell place. Spent my 2 weeks' break working, hoping that I will earn as much in the shortest time possible to repay Sarah. She was kind enough to loan me $350 to pay the fine. How did this fine came about? Well, naive-ess. More of stupidity I suppose. Even though I've heard rumours of him not being able to repay what he borrowed, I still went ahead and sign up an iphone for him. Really ought to slap myself to death.
He did not pay the bills; instead he went RWS to gamble. This kind of person ought to be banged to death, isn't it? His sister did not want to settle the bills because they fell out with each other over the iphone. His family gave him a big scolding and sent him off to KL. Initially, he assured me he's gonna to clear all the bills. Now, he's leaving this big pile of shit to clear for him! What's worse was, he could not be reached at his msia no anymoreeeeee. I'm really dead meat now. ''
Mum will definitely be livid if she knows about this matter. I really have no idea how am I gonna survive this. My heart can't take another lawyer's letter again. What I earned every month is not even enough to pay half of the bills! To top it off, I still have to pay my transport fees, meal allowance and etc. I am seriously in deep shit trouble now. Everytime when I open my letterbox, my hand trembles. I don't wish to receive any letters with my name on it. He even ignored the FB messages. Feeling super frustrated and lethargic about it and there's no one I can talk to about this matter so I can only post on my blog. Chinese New year is round the corner but I still have so much things in my head. Can't help but have a bad feeling like I will be kicked out of school if I'm taken to court for the next fine or mum will disown me. At times, really want to jump off and end this. Only when I disappear then everything will come to an end because that matter will remain a mystery forever. *double sighs*
Saturday, September 19, 2009
I miss polytechnic....
Oh my freaking god, ii so want to get into a polytechnic lahs. Best is Singapore Polytechnic. Seeing how Ben graduated from NP has made me so envious.
I really hope ii can score with a gpa of 3.0 which saves me a seat in the polytechnic. Best if ii could get a grade of 3.5. In this case, ii can just go straight to the second year. But ii doubt ii'll be that lucky to get a grade of 3.5. I made quite a number of mistakes in this exam. Oh god, please bless that ii'll pull through my last semester. Just one tinny whinny 6 months. Heard that it's gonna be alot more tougher than what ii expected. Please take pity on me and bless me. I really really wish ii can get into a polytechnic.
This has been a long term wish for me. Ever since the day ii got my O levels results, my hopes of getting into a polytechic had been completely destroyed. With my lousy grade of 31 points, ii can't even get into RP, not to mention SP or NP. I know mum has pinned hopes on me getting into a polytechnic and ii don't wish to let her down. I had spent extremely a lot of effort for this exams, revising everyday in school and at home despite having to miss my favourite dramas. Though she said she hasn't any hopes on me, but ii sensed that she really wants me to get into a poly. Most importantly, ii want to prove to those people that despised ITE students saying that they can never get into a poly.
ME, ANGIE CHO WILL SCORE GOOD GRADES AND GET INTO MY IDEAL POLYTECHNIC. JUST YOU ALL WAIT AND SEE!
haha.. don't laugh so loud, if never go very "lao kui" one. haha.
wish me this pity girl, good luck! =D
I really hope ii can score with a gpa of 3.0 which saves me a seat in the polytechnic. Best if ii could get a grade of 3.5. In this case, ii can just go straight to the second year. But ii doubt ii'll be that lucky to get a grade of 3.5. I made quite a number of mistakes in this exam. Oh god, please bless that ii'll pull through my last semester. Just one tinny whinny 6 months. Heard that it's gonna be alot more tougher than what ii expected. Please take pity on me and bless me. I really really wish ii can get into a polytechnic.
This has been a long term wish for me. Ever since the day ii got my O levels results, my hopes of getting into a polytechic had been completely destroyed. With my lousy grade of 31 points, ii can't even get into RP, not to mention SP or NP. I know mum has pinned hopes on me getting into a polytechnic and ii don't wish to let her down. I had spent extremely a lot of effort for this exams, revising everyday in school and at home despite having to miss my favourite dramas. Though she said she hasn't any hopes on me, but ii sensed that she really wants me to get into a poly. Most importantly, ii want to prove to those people that despised ITE students saying that they can never get into a poly.
ME, ANGIE CHO WILL SCORE GOOD GRADES AND GET INTO MY IDEAL POLYTECHNIC. JUST YOU ALL WAIT AND SEE!
haha.. don't laugh so loud, if never go very "lao kui" one. haha.
wish me this pity girl, good luck! =D
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
ii hate myself.
Now then ii realised haven't been posting for centuries of years. The last post was on 1st January. Imagine how long ago that was. No longer love myself, hate myself instead. Hate myself for being led by the nose by people [the saying in chinese; bei ren qian zhe bi zi zou]; hate myself for having no guts to reject; always giving in though ii'm not quite willing to.
Ever since that incident, everything had changed. We didn't seem as close as we used to be anymore. On the contrary, we seemed to have drifted apart. The first person that came to her mind when she feels bored is her. When ii texted her, ii received sarcastic replies. Explained that ii worked late that's why didn't msg her lest ii disturbed her. Her replies made me so pissed off that ii almost threw my phone out of the window.
When ii replied her late, she complained why ii took such a long time to reply; might as well don't reply. When ii texted her after my work, she complained again. I really don't know what she wants me to do. I replied her late, she's angry. I don't text her, she's also angry. But no matter if she replied her late or she never text her, she's okay with it. I have to work. I can't always be staring at my phone all the time, waiting to receive your msg and reply you. YES, I HAVE TO WORK. Isn't that what you always love to say?
When you asked if ii'm angry, ii wasn't but ii felt disappointed more. Certain things ii couldn't bring myself to say it to you face to face coz ii knew you would flew into a rage after hearing it. So ii kept to myself. You can never be on time or early when we meet up. Even though ii travelled all the way down to a place which is convenient to you, you're still late. Most of the times ii had to wait for you. You even requested me to text you when ii'm reaching, End up you were still at home when ii've reached. Do you know how it feels to be left waiting alone for whole 30 mins? Surprisingly, you were seldom late when you meet her. Does this means that ii can wait but she couldn't? You always say she says this, she says that. Are those words really said by her or it's just your way of covering up your lies? You never asked for my opinions. Whatever she says, you will go along with it no matter how strongly ii objected.
I'm tired, don't wish to argue with you anymore. Do what you deem fit. I have no idea how long we will last.
Ever since that incident, everything had changed. We didn't seem as close as we used to be anymore. On the contrary, we seemed to have drifted apart. The first person that came to her mind when she feels bored is her. When ii texted her, ii received sarcastic replies. Explained that ii worked late that's why didn't msg her lest ii disturbed her. Her replies made me so pissed off that ii almost threw my phone out of the window.
When ii replied her late, she complained why ii took such a long time to reply; might as well don't reply. When ii texted her after my work, she complained again. I really don't know what she wants me to do. I replied her late, she's angry. I don't text her, she's also angry. But no matter if she replied her late or she never text her, she's okay with it. I have to work. I can't always be staring at my phone all the time, waiting to receive your msg and reply you. YES, I HAVE TO WORK. Isn't that what you always love to say?
When you asked if ii'm angry, ii wasn't but ii felt disappointed more. Certain things ii couldn't bring myself to say it to you face to face coz ii knew you would flew into a rage after hearing it. So ii kept to myself. You can never be on time or early when we meet up. Even though ii travelled all the way down to a place which is convenient to you, you're still late. Most of the times ii had to wait for you. You even requested me to text you when ii'm reaching, End up you were still at home when ii've reached. Do you know how it feels to be left waiting alone for whole 30 mins? Surprisingly, you were seldom late when you meet her. Does this means that ii can wait but she couldn't? You always say she says this, she says that. Are those words really said by her or it's just your way of covering up your lies? You never asked for my opinions. Whatever she says, you will go along with it no matter how strongly ii objected.
I'm tired, don't wish to argue with you anymore. Do what you deem fit. I have no idea how long we will last.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2009!!
Everything was the same for work today except, he didn't speak a word to me. He spoke to everybody except me. It was the first time ii encountered having no one to talk to during work. All the others were so busy with their stuff. Even if friends also don't talk everyday, but he simply talks to everyone. Work without having anybody to talk simply seems extremely terrible. And we're going to work in the same shift tmr. OHHH, II DON'T WANT TO GO WORK ANYMORE!
Everytime we bumped into each other, I have this creepy feeling that it's my fault that causes the drastic change in his attitude towards me. The feeling is just terrible. I really don't know what he's thinking. Men's minds are so hard to fathom Maybe ii should forget about him and get on with my life. Oh well, ii'll just have to endure. Drats, we're working together again on saturday morning. Oh, I never want to be in the same shift as him again. Never again!
Anyway, HAPPY YEAR 2009 TO ALL OF YOU! May everything and anything run smoothly for you all, most importantly no more 'small man'. FORGET EVERYTHING ABOUT 2008 AND LIVE 2009 TO THE FULLEST EACH DAY! DON'T WASTE IT!
~~3 CHEERS FOR ME, HIP HIP HURRAY~~
Everytime we bumped into each other, I have this creepy feeling that it's my fault that causes the drastic change in his attitude towards me. The feeling is just terrible. I really don't know what he's thinking. Men's minds are so hard to fathom Maybe ii should forget about him and get on with my life. Oh well, ii'll just have to endure. Drats, we're working together again on saturday morning. Oh, I never want to be in the same shift as him again. Never again!
Anyway, HAPPY YEAR 2009 TO ALL OF YOU! May everything and anything run smoothly for you all, most importantly no more 'small man'. FORGET EVERYTHING ABOUT 2008 AND LIVE 2009 TO THE FULLEST EACH DAY! DON'T WASTE IT!
~~3 CHEERS FOR ME, HIP HIP HURRAY~~
Monday, December 29, 2008
~~HAPPY 24TH BIRTHDAY TO MY DEAREST SIS!~~
24 years old, old already. Must learn how to think uhs.
Okay, so that's what he said. To maintain a distance between us and not to bother him again. If not we'll never be friends again. Oh man, he's such a real jerk and a scumbag. How ii really DETEST HIM and wish for his disappearance! Fine. If he doesn't wants to talk to me, ii shall simply ignore him then! That's tic-for-tat. So much for all those sweet words earlier on. Blame it on my stupidity for believing him. Argh, how ii hate myself nowwww!
Anyway, it's best that he's not going to talk to me. I don't feel like talking to him either. All he does is only spouts nonsense and kiddish talks. Seriously, ii totally have no idea what's going on. We were still chatting happily in the afternoon and even agreed to meet for dinner after his work. But he didn't appear and that's it. Oh gosh, peini is not working on thursday night and that's only left me and him. Think ii'll be bored to death!
Okay, bought a nice dress for chinese new year today. It simply looks fabulous and gorgeous. Hurray, ii'm going to pasta de waruku at heeren tmr to lunch with my army peeps! They purposely applied for leave and lunch-ed with me. Isn't that wonderful? Oh yeah, thumbs up for them!
Alright, off to visit Serene. She's having chicken pox. Oh man, poor girl. Get well soon!
~~~Byeeeee~~~~~
24 years old, old already. Must learn how to think uhs.
Okay, so that's what he said. To maintain a distance between us and not to bother him again. If not we'll never be friends again. Oh man, he's such a real jerk and a scumbag. How ii really DETEST HIM and wish for his disappearance! Fine. If he doesn't wants to talk to me, ii shall simply ignore him then! That's tic-for-tat. So much for all those sweet words earlier on. Blame it on my stupidity for believing him. Argh, how ii hate myself nowwww!
Anyway, it's best that he's not going to talk to me. I don't feel like talking to him either. All he does is only spouts nonsense and kiddish talks. Seriously, ii totally have no idea what's going on. We were still chatting happily in the afternoon and even agreed to meet for dinner after his work. But he didn't appear and that's it. Oh gosh, peini is not working on thursday night and that's only left me and him. Think ii'll be bored to death!
Okay, bought a nice dress for chinese new year today. It simply looks fabulous and gorgeous. Hurray, ii'm going to pasta de waruku at heeren tmr to lunch with my army peeps! They purposely applied for leave and lunch-ed with me. Isn't that wonderful? Oh yeah, thumbs up for them!
Alright, off to visit Serene. She's having chicken pox. Oh man, poor girl. Get well soon!
~~~Byeeeee~~~~~
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Bad Christmas...
Hello people, ii'm back to my blog! Have been disappearing from months coz my pc has broke down, and it's finally alive now. HAHAHAS! ~~shermaine, ii miss you~~
Hais, something bad happened to me yesterday. Worked 10 hours straight until the sole of my feet had blisters. No idea how am ii going to work today.. Surprisingly, it didn't rained yesterday and the crowd were coming in non-stop. But luckily ii still managed to finish work at 3pm. ~~phew~~
Supposed to meet for lunch but he didn't show up as he had some family problems to settle. Okay, that's fine. The worst thing was he didn't appear for dinner too.
Left me waiting at the train station for 30 mins. Shouted for his name and he simply walked off even though he heard me and saw me. Didn't bother to call and say he got to rush home. Phoned him and he didn't answer any of my calls. After my numerous calls, he just texted me and said 'let's maintain a distance between both of us'. That's it. Seriously, HE'S SUCH A BASTARD, AND A COWARDLY BASTARD. Just one message and you think everything has never happened? Don't be stupid.
How stupid of me to believe whatver he said and foolishly took his words seriously. Laugh at my stupidness. Don't bother to explain the reason for this coz ii won't bother to listen. Don't forget you said to keep a distance away. Alright, ii should move on without him.
Scram far away from me, ii never want to hear you speak again.
Hais, something bad happened to me yesterday. Worked 10 hours straight until the sole of my feet had blisters. No idea how am ii going to work today.. Surprisingly, it didn't rained yesterday and the crowd were coming in non-stop. But luckily ii still managed to finish work at 3pm. ~~phew~~
Supposed to meet for lunch but he didn't show up as he had some family problems to settle. Okay, that's fine. The worst thing was he didn't appear for dinner too.
Left me waiting at the train station for 30 mins. Shouted for his name and he simply walked off even though he heard me and saw me. Didn't bother to call and say he got to rush home. Phoned him and he didn't answer any of my calls. After my numerous calls, he just texted me and said 'let's maintain a distance between both of us'. That's it. Seriously, HE'S SUCH A BASTARD, AND A COWARDLY BASTARD. Just one message and you think everything has never happened? Don't be stupid.
How stupid of me to believe whatver he said and foolishly took his words seriously. Laugh at my stupidness. Don't bother to explain the reason for this coz ii won't bother to listen. Don't forget you said to keep a distance away. Alright, ii should move on without him.
Scram far away from me, ii never want to hear you speak again.
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